‘Succulent’ ‘U have an undisclosed imagination Keith’ ‘Scraping the barrel is imaginative’ New Ibrox signing policy is under attack

Keith Jackson proved that humour/irony isn’t dead with a stunning opinion piece this morning explaining the Imaginative Transfer Policy from Ibrox. 

It seems that after picking up some loose change from Southampton the company has ditched the Player Trading Model based on picking up Dembele Dollars just like Selik. 

Describing Antonio Colak and Tom Lawrence as part of a strategy is quite a stretch but once upon a time a scruffy wee guy from Motherwell was unveiled as Scotland’s richest man with wealth so far off the radar that the Daily Record had been unable to previously detect Mister Whyte. 

Spending less than £2m on two journeymen in their late twenties is unlikely to transform a stale ageing squad that has delivered two out of 12 domestic trophies over the last four years. 

Others are in the pipeline as van Bronckhorst rushes to spend whatever cash has been sent his way from the sale of Aribo. That deal involved a ‘significant undisclosed fee’ according to the club.

The complete mismanagement of the squad is best viewed in central defence where John Souttar joins Filip Helander, Nicky Katic, Calvin Bassey, Jack Simpson in the battle to partner Connor Goldson in central defence. 

In three weeks time Van Bronckhorst faces a Champions League Third Round qualifier that is likely to test his Imaginative Transfer Policy.

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