FF financial expert reveals why septic ST holder at Lloyds Bank is to blame for Viaplay Cup Final defeat

A senior member of Follow Follow has been able to trace back the difficulties at both clubs over the last 15 years to a ‘septic ST holder’ in a senior position at Lloyds Bank.

After a three month fantasy under Micky Beale when the Tribute Act was on the verge of global domination there was an unwelcome visit from reality at Hampden on Sunday.

Basically the manager isn’t as good as they thought, the players aren’t very good either and the other mob are just sort of better at everything important.

There aren’t many Ibrox fans that can remember life before David Holmes and David Murray, the gap between 1978 and 1987 when Aberdeen, Celtic and Dundee United shared the titles with Ibrox half full as the few loyal bears chanted for John Greig to get sacked.

The Greatest Living Rangers survived five years as manager without getting his hands on the old Premier Division title before taking up a job with Dixon Travel Agency after being booted out onto Edmiston Drive.

Through a variety of schemes and scams Murray changed all that, delivered untold domestic successes until Fergus McCann sorted Celtic out with Martin O’Neill delivering success on the pitch.

With Celtic stronger in every area time was up for Murray, he had a good run at it, as the owner of Rangers he got the red carpet treatment across Scotland but the debts mounted at Ibrox till he accepted a pound coin from a former billionaire.

Rather than admit they were duped by Murray most bears prefer the comfort of conspiracy theories, usually involving The Vatican, HBOS, John Reid, Lloyds Bank, the SFA, the Labour Party, the SNP and best of all Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs which had been hijacked by some mean spirited Selik/Septik fans jealous of success at Ibrox.

It is a comforting tale, as the dreaded prospect of a fifth Celtic treble in a decade comes around some bears have been discussing the septic conspiracy that their Tribute Act is being held back by.